Monday, August 17, 2009

Reminiscing, and Mosquitoes

We went camping for the first time last weekend. It was hot as the devil's armpit (sticky and sweaty too) but we had a wonderful time. We didn't go far, just to a state park an hour south of home, but it was far enough to relax for a bit and enjoy the outdoors.

The Subaru was laden down with B's canoe, our bikes, fishing stuff, and all the requisite gear - earning it the new name of The Adventure-Mobile. We got to use our tent for the first time (camping in the in-law's front yard doesn't count) and I got a new sleeping bag, which unfortunately is nylon inside and out. I wouldn't mind normally, but it was so hot and sticky and sweaty that I wound up glued to the thing. Add to that a sadly deflated air pad, and sleeping was kind of uncomfortable - but not so much that it affected the fun of getting away from home for a couple of days.

It might sound weird, but I think my favorite part was planning the trip. It made me think so much of my dad, and how ridiculously organized he was about camping. He had multiple lists, special Rubbermaid camp boxes that stayed packed with essential items, and gear suitable for van camping, tenting, or RVing. It was truly an artform, so I had that standard in my head while planning our trip. I forgot a couple of things (ziplock bags and anti-histamine lotion), purposefully left out others (corned beef hash, bleah!), and added a couple of our own touches (fresh garden tomatoes and potatoes). We had to buy a few pieces of necessary gear (a percolator, some dollar-store utensils for campfire cooking) and added a few more pieces to our list for next time (a dutch oven, a new foam sleeping pad).

The key part of any trip with Dad was the fishing. He had the aluminum Nymph rowboat, the 'peapod' black vinyl folding rowboat, float tubes, and the Boston Whaler for bigger lakes. He had multiple flyrods and spinners. He used a depth-finder sometimes, and had a detailed atlas and mental list of lakes, what fish they held, and what the best fly was. And he rarely got skunked, or at least that's how it seemed. How could he, after all?

We're getting there. We have the canoe, which I'm getting used to the balance of and learning how to paddle. B has a flyrod and a good spinner, and he bought me my own spinner this summer and promises me a flyrod soon too. My regret is that I'm just now learning how to enjoy it - the quieter campsites, the lakes with no-motor regulations, the repetitive, relaxing solitude of fishing - I didn't fully appreciate it when Dad was around, and it makes me sad that I missed those chances. But it makes me that much happier to be doing it now.

Dad, Mom, and Romeo at Big Meadow Lake.

Friday, August 7, 2009

Daisy, give yourself away...

The past couple of days I've become conscious of the fact that every morning, without fail, I have a random song stuck in my head. Sometimes it's there as soon as I wake up, sometimes it pops in my head while I'm in the shower, sometimes while I'm doing my makeup. I've decided to Tweet about this phenomenon every day to keep track of it (maybe create an iTunes playlist based on it?) and see what, if anything, it tells me about myself and the craziness in my head.

So since this past Wednesday, it's been the following:
John Mayer - Daughters
The Killers - Human
Switchfoot - Daisy

So what does this tell me?

#1 -- When 'Daughters' popped into my head while showering on Wednesday, I realized that the lyrics are really kind of screwed up. The bridge goes like this:

Boys, you can break
Find out how much they can take
'Cause boys will be strong
Boys soldier on
But boys would be gone without warmth
from a woman's good, good heart

This is a truly ridiculous statement to make. Boys are tough, you can berate them and beat them down and they're like the Energizer Bunny, they'll just keep on going! Ugh. Bullshit. I don't think I even need to say anything more.

But why did this come into my head? Maybe to reiterate the fact that I need to have a warmer heart, especially towards B...?

#2 -- Are we human, or are we dancer? I have no clue what this means. Am I human? I'm not a dancer, I know that much. Although it'd be fun to take some ballroom lessons with B maybe...

#3 -- Let it go, Daisy let it go
Open up your fists, this fallen world
Doesn't hold your interest, doesn't hold your soul
Daisy let it go

Why do I care so much about what other people think of me, of the work I do, of the life I live? This fallen world doesn't hold my soul... I need to worry about ME, about MY happiness and who I am. I think. Sounds good, anyway.

Psychoanalyzing yourself isn't very easy, especially through somewhat incongruous song lyrics. To be continued...